Evolve or remain.

Somewhere along the line, I made the decision to stop accepting half-love and half-assed anything. From myself, from the people around me, from the life I'm determined to cultivate. It never was enough, and it never was going to be. I got tired of trying to force things to be worth more than they were. I got tired of wasting patience on things that I shouldn't have ever had to wait for.  I know. That sounds like a very easy decision to have to make- but it has been the hardest. The best, but the hardest. It has been the source of bridges I've had to burn, and walls that I've built up and torn down again over and over. It has been the core of what keeps my hands moving across empty notebook pages at obscene morning hours while the world around me rests peacefully. It has been the border between me saying "goodnight" and "goodbye," even to the people I thought were the closest to me.  It has been wild, and awful, and messy, and beautiful, and sometimes...

Just on my drive to work, I pay close attention to humanity. I always have. People and their stories have always fascinated me. There's an older gentleman strolling through my neighborhood, alone - and part of me is wishing I didn't have to clock in so I could keep him company. I'm sure he's got a lot on his mind, and possibly nobody to share it with at home. Two blocks down there's a young woman tending to flower beds in her front yard, in old jeans and a distressed t-shirt, wiping sweat from her forehead and I'm wondering how long she's been working. I wonder why she chose to plant the flowers that she did, or if those were even her choices in the first place. Maybe the gardening is a chore to her, but I'm hoping it's something that brings her comfort of some kind, too. I don't know anything about her, but I feel like she deserves that. There's a team of young kids playing soccer in a schoolyard not far from my house. Cars are lining the st...